Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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