Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
