I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just found puke in my bra..
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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