I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Randomize
