do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
