best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
My Sexting was not on an AP level
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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