It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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