I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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