The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
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