i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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