Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
