jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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