Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
