i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Randomize
