You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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