I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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