Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
