He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
