his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Randomize
