how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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