He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
