Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
