Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
