im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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