o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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