I'm jealous of your bromance
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
please don't ironically join a cult
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