she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
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