Having a random hookup so left but love u
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
