Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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