sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
