Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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