I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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