Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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