I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
