He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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