I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
