Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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