It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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