your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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