3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
