Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Of course I have a pirate flag
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
