So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
