omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
