We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
And then my night got REAL pukey
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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