Yo dont text me then not text me
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
