Welp...herpes.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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