I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize
