it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
