We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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