Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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