I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
